Prayer

This article will help you consider both the relational and consequential natures of prayer.

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What I want you to learn is how to dig your own well, so that when you are light years down the road in your walk with God, you will be set up to walk with God wherever he takes you. No matter what the circumstances, no matter how dry things are around you, you know how to get out the tools and start to dig your own well—a deep well with God that is full of living water.

There are basically two major tools that God gives us to dig our own well. The first tool that God gives us is the Scriptures. You need to be a person who knows how to feast on God’s Word—a person who agrees with Jesus when he says that “man does not live by bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God.” As you use this tool, you will be led to use the other tool that is crucial to dig a deep well. The other tool is prayer! It is how we dig the hole to receive the rain, if you will.

These two tools are what we use to put ourselves in position to receive the wisdom and revelation that the Holy Spirit wants to give us so we can know God better. As you use the first tool of Scripture, it will lead you to respond in prayer—it should lead you to a life of prayer. If not, then it is like just breaking up the dirt but never using a shovel to get it out. Prayer is how we get Scripture to permeate and take root in our hearts. And Scripture is what informs our prayer. We don’t just pray based on speculation about God, full of distortions, but we pray based on his revelation given to us through Scripture. Thus the use of one tool leads to the use of the other.

When this happens, not only will your well go deeper in your relationship with God, but then you also will be a deep well for many people around you. Bernard of Clairvaux, from the 12th century, used the images of a canal verses a reservoir. He said that a canal just spreads water abroad as it receives it, but a reservoir is filled before overflowing, and then gives, without loss to itself, its superabundant water. He said we have many canals but few reservoirs!1 We need more reservoirs, or to use my image, we need more deep and wide wells! Richard Foster says “The desperate need today is not for a greater number of intelligent people, or gifted people, but for deep people.”2 Determine to be a reservoir or a deep well! Let’s take a closer look at the tool of prayer.

Inside Focus

I think there are two major ways people think about prayer. There is one group that would say prayer doesn’t really make that big of a difference. It isn’t that consequential. Rather, God uses our needs to bring us to him so we can commune with him. He will change us through prayer so we can embrace the circumstance, but it doesn’t really change circumstances—it changes us. This view stresses the relational side of prayer at the expense of prayer having any fundamental causality (it doesn’t cause anything to happen or have any influence on real events). This group quotes Scriptures like Matthew 6:8, “God knows what you need before you ask him.” I would say yes, in prayer we don’t inform God, but we express our dependence on him and bring him into the equation of whatever we are facing.

The problem is, this view of prayer stands against many other Scriptures. There are verses that speak to the fact that prayer does make a difference (2 Cor. 1:10-11, Phil. 1:19). I love this quote by Paul York: “There are some things that God will not do even if you ask him. There are some things that God will do even if we don’t ask him. Then there are some things that the Bible says will happen only if we do pray” (James 5:13-16, 2 Chronicles 7:11-16, Mark 9:29, to name a few).

Outside Focus

Then there are others who focus on the causality of prayer. They say things like, “All you need to do is stand on the promise, have unwavering faith, name it and claim it, and it shall be yours.” This can be a way of trying to get what we want as if God were a slot machine. If you say the right thing and pull the handle, God spits out the right stuff. And in the process, the relational aspect of prayer is lost. There is no intimacy of prayer. Your prayer time starts to be all about getting through your “prayer list” and saying the right thing. This group may not verbalize that there isn’t a relational aspect to prayer, but it just gets lost in the wash. They miss where in the Scripture it says that the Holy Spirit within us cries out, “Abba, Father”, longing for intimacy with God. Prayer is intensely intimate. Jesus taught us to pray “Our Father...”.

The Pinnacle of Prayer

I would submit that the pinnacle of prayer is when your view of prayer understands both—there is powerful influence that is born out of our relationship with him.

Let’s talk about how God uses prayer to lead us into this. There are many forms of prayer that place us in position to receive from the Holy Spirit wisdom and revelation. As we engage in thanksgiving, adoration, praise, worship (singing), listening in his presence, resting in his presence, and confession, God leads us to know him better. God uses these methods to get our attention, and as we commune with him and connect with our heavenly Father, we begin to be reminded of who he is.

It is like over the course of our days, our view of God starts to fall slowly and subtly, but when we enter into worship, adoration and thanksgiving, he is magnified in the eyes of our heart. As he is magnified, we see him more clearly and in greater detail, and we get to know him better. Not just know about him, but by the work of the Holy Spirit, we can commune with him and get to know him better!

I love a quote from Prince Caspian by C. S. Lewis. Aslan says to Lucy, “Every year you grow, you will find me bigger." May that be! As you grow, may you find God bigger! May we be people with deep wells full of intimate knowledge of him! Will we put ourselves in position to receive wisdom and revelation from the Holy Spirit, and allow the Holy Spirit to take it from our head to revelation in our heart?

In Ephesians 1:19-23, Paul talks about the power of God. He says he wants us to know “His incomparably great power for us who believe” [emphasis added]. The word in Greek that we translate “incomparably” great, literally means to “go beyond” our greatest conception. Your greatest conception of what God’s power is—God’s power goes beyond it! Mark Batterson says, “It is impossible to overestimate God!” I love that. His power is infinite! It is resurrection power! It is the same power that raised Jesus from the dead, defeating sin, death and hell. Christianity is a religion of power—ultimate power! Jesus sits in the seat of ultimate power! At the Father’s right hand in the heavenly realms. He is more powerful than any demonic or evil power, over any human power. He has the ultimate title!

Paul says he wants us to know that this power is available to us, who believe in Jesus. Prayer is how we access this incomparably great power! Oh, that God’s people would know the power that is available to us and access it through prayer to be victorious in our personal lives and fight the enemy in our world.

What would happen if we became a fellowship who lived as Paul prayed for the church in Ephesus, with an understanding of God’s incomparably great power available to us and continually accessed that power through prayer? What could God do at UVA? I can tell you the precursor for every great revival is prayer!

Let me end where I started: I want you to be a person and I want us to be a fellowship with a deep well; people who know how to dig our own well. Will we put ourselves in position for the Holy Spirit to give us wisdom and revelation and get to know God better? Will we access God’s incomparably great power that is available to us through prayer?

Relevant Scriptures

2 Chronicles 7:11-16 Solomon’s dedication of the temple to God

Matt. 6:5-15 “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites...”

Mark 9:14-29 (v.29) He replied, “This kind can come out only by prayer.”

James 5:13-16 Is anyone among you in trouble? Let them pray...

Ephesians 1:17-23 I keep asking that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ...

Questions for Discussion

  • What do you think actually happens when we pray? Is it for us, God, or for both?
  • Do you find yourself focusing more on the inner or outer aspect of prayer? How does thinking through the pinnacle of prayer help you bring balance?
  • When have you seen answers to prayer in your own life or in the lives of others? What has this done for your faith and your view of God?
  • What do you want to see God do in his incomparably great power? This could be on many levels: for the world, UVA, Chi Alpha, your family, and for you.
  • In what ways do you want to grow in being a person of prayer?
  • How can you dig a deeper well with God this week?

By Chi Alpha June 13, 2025
Download Time Management Why Time Management Matters One of the greatest hindrances to our walks with God is poor time management. Many of us genuinely want to spend scheduled alone time with Jesus each day, but we don’t. We plan to read Scripture, pray, and listen for what God is speaking, but somehow the day gets away from us. Does this sound familiar? You intended to start your day with Jesus... but you stayed up late hanging out with friends, scrolling TikTok or Instagram, or maybe studying into the early morning. You sleep through your alarm, roll out of bed at the last possible second, and rush to class. When you make it back home, you're either exhausted and need a nap or jumping straight into homework. Your mind is racing with everything on your to-do list, and stopping to be still with God feels almost impossible. It’s not that you don’t care and don’t want to spend time with Jesus. The problem is that your schedule (or lack thereof) has taken control of your life. But imagine this: you start each day unhurried, grounded in God’s Word. You show up to class present and peaceful. You don’t feel behind all the time. You’re able to attend Core Group and MNL without guilt. You take a Sabbath on the weekend and truly feel rested. That’s what we want for you. This resource will give you a few simple tools and frameworks that you can use to help you build that kind of life! Quadrants of Time Management Before we get practical with some tools for time management, it helps to understand why our time often feels out of control. One simple framework, the Quadrants of Time Management, divides everything we do into four categories: urgent and important, not urgent but important, urgent but not important, and neither urgent nor important. Most of us live in the extremes—either in crisis mode, constantly reacting to what’s due next (urgent and important), or in escape mode, numbing out with social media or distractions (not urgent, not important). But the goal is to build our lives around the important but not urgent—things like spending time with Jesus, planning ahead, resting well, and growing intentionally. Below are descriptions of each of the four quadrants. As you read over them, take a moment to reflect and consider which quadrants you spend the most time in. Quadrant 1 : Tasks that demand immediate attention and truly matter, like crises that may come up or a project that is due tomorrow. Many important activities become urgent as a result of procrastination or poor planning. This quadrant creates a ton of stress, saps your energy, and leads to burnout. Quadrant 2 : This is where you build a healthy, purposeful life. It includes working on assignments ahead of time, resting well, spending time with Jesus, and investing in relationships. This quadrant increases your peace, productivity, and long-term fruitfulness, but it’s often the most neglected. Quadrant 3 : Things that feel urgent but don’t really matter. These distractions, like responding to group texts or unimportant requests, steal your focus. Learning to say “no” here allows you to prioritize what matters more. Quadrant 4 : Mindless time-wasters like endless scrolling, binge-watching, or lying in bed “rotting.” These activities offer short-term relief, especially when you’re overwhelmed, but too much time here leads to feeling disconnected, discouraged, and stuck. The goal for our time management is to live in Quadrant 2! Living here will: Make your life much less stressful Enable you to thrive as a student, friend, leader, etc. Help your walk with God be more consistent. You’ll no longer be trying to squeeze God in, but able to intentionally walk with Him daily, allowing Him to shape your entire life! But if your time management is a mess, you will struggle to live that kind of life, no matter how much you would like to . So how do we start living more consistently in Quadrant 2? Here are some tools! Anchor Times If you want to live an anchored life—with real devotion to Jesus, real community with others (where you’re committed to Core Group and MNL), and real Kingdom responsibility—it won’t happen by accident. You need anchor times: the fixed, pre-decided parts of your day that keep your schedule aligned with your priorities and keep you anchored in your rhythms. Setting anchor times is what we call a pre-choice, a decision you make before the moment comes . Instead of waiting to see how you feel or what comes up, you’ve already decided what matters most. Pre-choices reflect your values ahead of time, so you’re not constantly scrambling, reacting, or letting the urgent crowd out the important. Here are two of the most powerful (and neglected) anchors of your day: 1. Wake up time I know, this one’s tough, but your morning is one of the most important times in your entire day. It sets your mindset, your pace, and your spiritual posture. To determine your wake up time, start by asking yourself: When is my first class or meeting of the day? What time do I need to be there? How much time do I need to saturate in God’s Word, presence, and love before I start my day? How long does it take to eat, shower, and commute before my first class/meeting? Now, take those answers and build your morning backward. Start with the time you need to be out the door (or in class), and subtract the time it takes for each of those things: time with God, getting ready, eating, commuting, etc. The result? That’s your wake-up time! Pro tip: make sure it’s realistic. You might need to speed up your shower or simplify your breakfast to preserve unhurried time with Jesus without forcing yourself to wake up at an impossible hour. 2. Bedtime The other most powerful anchor time is your bedtime. Sometimes people act like running on no sleep is impressive, but it’s actually unsustainable. You might be able to run on empty for a day, but not for a week. Without sleep, your health, focus, relationships, and ability to hear from God all suffer. It has been said, “A great devotional time with the Lord starts the night before.” If you want your mornings with Jesus to be consistent and unhurried, it begins with the choices you make the night before. Ask yourself: How much sleep do I need to feel well-rested? Based on when I need to wake up and how many hours of sleep I need, when should I go to bed? Time Blocking Setting anchor times creates a strong foundation, and our next tool, time blocking, fills in the rest of your schedule with intention and structure. Imagine this scenario: you get home from class in the afternoon and you’re tired. You don’t feel like studying and you don’t have anything planned until dinner, so you spend the next three hours of “free time” taking a nap, going down the YouTube rabbit hole, or doom-scrolling on Instagram or TikTok. All the while, your assignments are piling up, and your anxiety is too! Now imagine this: at the start of each week, you take some time to list out your upcoming homework, tests, papers, and problem sets. Then, you schedule specific times on your calendar to work on each one. When that time comes, you simply do the task—no last-minute scrambling, no wondering when you’ll get it done. Time blocking is a method of planning your day by assigning each hour to a specific task, activity, or category of work. You’re giving every hour a name before it arrives . It’s a practical way to make pre-choices. To do it, you’ll need a calendar with hourly time slots. We strongly recommend using a digital calendar , like Google Calendar, to keep your week organized. A digital calendar makes it easy to drag and adjust time blocks as things change, it’s always accessible, and you can set reminders so nothing slips through the cracks. Once your digital calendar is ready, start by blocking out your anchor times, your fixed commitments that don’t change — your wake-up time, bedtime, and devotional time, as well as things like classes, labs, work shifts, MNL, and Core Group. Next, look at what academic work is coming up: exams, papers, readings, problem sets, etc. Instead of just hoping you’ll get to it, assign each task a specific block in your week. For example, if you have a test covering four chapters, you might schedule time to review one chapter a day, then assign time the day before to review them all. If a problem set usually takes six hours, break it into two-hour chunks across three days. If there are weekly office hours for a class you’re struggling with, put those on your calendar and make sure you go and ask your professor for help. Be sure to leave some margin in your schedule—time to get from place to place, take a short break, or adjust if something runs long . Time blocking removes the stress of last-minute work and gives you confidence that everything has its place. Green, Yellow, and Red Hours When you time block your week, it’s smart to take your energy levels into account, not just your availability . That’s where this next concept comes in. We all have green, yellow, and red hours. Green hours are when you’re mentally sharp and productive. You’ll want to use your green hours for your hardest tasks, like writing papers, studying for exams, or working on problem sets. Yellow hours are when you still have some fuel in the tank, but you aren’t at your best. They are good for lighter work, like reading assignments, organizing your notes, or creating flashcards. Red hours are your lowest-energy times, when it’s hard to focus and think clearly. Save those times for going to the gym, hanging with friends, or resting. Putting It All Together When you make pre-choices, set anchor times, and time block your week around your energy and priorities, you are going to notice a big difference! These tips won’t fix all your problems, but you’ll likely feel less stressed and more present in your classes, relationships, and with the Lord. We want you to be able to live your life in Quadrant 2! At first, planning like this may feel rigid and limiting. It is true that you may have to say “no” to some things, but planning ahead can give you more freedom. When you’re disciplined during the day, you can say a confident “yes” to rest, spontaneity, and time with your community in the evenings. By choosing to manage your time well, you’re choosing to live fully — present with God, stewarding your studies well, engaged in your community, and investing in your spiritual formation. Questions for Discussion What’s one part of your current schedule that feels out of control or misaligned with your priorities? Which quadrant do you spend most of your time in, and how can you live more in Quadrant 2? Will you take 30 minutes to time block your calendar this week? When? What do you want to make sure gets scheduled first? Who in your life could help you stay accountable to the rhythms you want to build (wake up time, bedtime, devotional time, etc.?
By Chi Alpha October 16, 2024
Download Friendship “Friendship is the ultimate end of our existence and our highest source of happiness. Friendship—with one another and with God—is the supreme pleasure of life, both now and forever…” –Drew Hunter, Author and Pastor For centuries, the Church fathers, ancient philosophers, and theologians have all agreed that friendship is a necessary component of living life to the full. Intentional friendship is defined as friendship mutually governed by Godly (agape) love and is a reflection of his devotion and character. The Bible is filled with great examples of extraordinary friendships involving personal sacrifice, deep intimacy, and incredible joy. Unfortunately, though, our culture is quickly losing the value of friendship. It has become a button on a social media page or a means to climb the social ladder. We all crave deep connections but have lost the art of finding and cultivating true and lasting friendships. Below is a guide meant to help remedy this problem; it also has several questions throughout for you to reflect on as you read. We often think that friendship just happens, but as Drew Hunter demonstrates, in order to recapture the art of friendship, it will take wisdom, work, and a bit of weeding. By doing so, we can restore the profound joy and deep connections that authentic friendships bring to our lives. Wisdom 1. Give Your Friends a Promotion The first bit of wisdom begins by dispelling a common myth about friendship: you are too busy. When friendships falter, it's often due to unbalanced priorities. While homework, your internship, and rest are essential, overemphasizing them can crowd out time for intentional friendships. We always find time for what we truly value, so it's worth examining how we spend our leisure time and considering if we can allocate some of it to nurturing friendships. Prioritizing friends may require sacrificing other enjoyable activities. If someone looked at how you spent your time this past week (where you were, what you did, who you spent time with), what five things would they conclude are most important to you? How highly do your friendships rank? 2. Take a Dose of Realism A second myth about friendship is that we can have a lot of close friends. Since deep friendships require significant time, it's unrealistic to maintain close bonds with everyone. Trying to do so can result in having no close friends at all. Most people we call friends are actually acquaintances. It's important to value these acquaintanceships without feeling guilty about having only a few deep relationships. Meaningful friendships will naturally form with only a small percentage of the people we know. Jesus exemplifies this. He had an especially intimate bond with John, often referred to as the disciple whom Jesus loved. Jesus also prioritized his relationship with Peter, James, and John, revealing a bit of his divine nature to them at the Transfiguration. Beyond these, Jesus had the twelve disciples with whom he spent considerable time; living alongside and teaching them. This tiered approach to relationships shows that even Jesus, God incarnate, prioritized deeper connections with a few while still maintaining meaningful, albeit less intimate, relationships with many. Why is it unrealistic to try to maintain close bonds with many people, and how can this effort actually hinder the development of meaningful friendships? Reflect on the example of Jesus' relationships and think about how you can discern and prioritize your own deeper connections. 3. Realign your Expectations Friendship requires flexibility in how we perceive and manage relationships. Not everyone has the same expectations for a friendship; when these expectations conflict, they can lead to incredible pain and strife. Let's use an analogy. Picture yourself driving down a multi-lane highway, and each lane represents different levels of relationship. We may see someone as a close friend (in our passenger seat), but they might not feel the same way and think of us in their left lane instead. Adjusting our expectations to match theirs is crucial to maintaining the friendship without forcing them to conform to our views. Conversely, if someone sees us as a close friend, even if we initially don't feel the same, we can choose to embrace and honor their perspective. Friendships evolve over time, with people moving between lanes or exiting the highway altogether. This fluidity doesn't negate the commitment inherent in friendships but reflects their dynamic nature, allowing for changes and growth. These changes can be difficult, but recognizing that they are normal can lead to healthy expectations and more joy-filled relationships. Reflect on a time when you and a friend had different expectations for your relationship. How did this difference impact your friendship, and what steps did you take (or could you have taken) to adjust your expectations and maintain the relationship? Work 1. Talk Face-to-Face Friendships thrive through meaningful conversations, especially face-to-face. Unhurried, in-person dialogues are invaluable; as John Calvin noted, “If only he lived close by, a three-hour talk would exceed a hundred letters.” While text messages sustain friendships, phone calls bring us closer by conveying more of our personality, and nothing beats the completeness of face-to-face interactions. In his letters, the apostle John writes, “Though I have much to write to you…I would rather not use paper and ink. Instead, I hope to come to you and talk face-to-face so that our joy may be complete” (2 John 12; 3 John 13-14). Conversations should be open and honest, with trusted friends having access to our deeper, more personal truths. Effective communication involves both asking thoughtful questions and actively listening. Friendships suffer if one person dominates the conversation or if there is a lack of engagement. The best friendships balance serious discussions with light-hearted moments, ensuring a mix of levity and gravity. Think about a recent face-to-face conversation you had with a friend. How did this interaction compare to your typical text or phone conversations in terms of depth and connection? What did you notice about the value of in-person dialogue? What practical ways can you pursue more face-to-face time with friends? 2. Do Things Side-by-Side Friendships flourish through shared experiences and spending time together. To build such experiences, invite friends into your existing activities, like watching shows, walking, or shopping. Creating regular rhythms, such as biweekly coffee or weekly dinners, helps maintain these connections. When regularity is challenging, spontaneity and sacrifice can sustain friendships. Ultimately, the essence of friendship lies in being together, regardless of the activity. Think about a recent shared experience you had with a friend. How did participating in an activity together impact your relationship? What did you learn about your friend or yourself during this time? Consider the idea of creating regular rhythms, such as biweekly coffee or weekly dinners. What regular activities could you establish with your friends to maintain consistent connections? How would these routines fit into your current schedule? 3. Encourage From the Heart Encouragement is vital for sustaining friendships, akin to oxygen for the soul. Like thin air at high altitudes, relationships suffer without affirmation and encouragement while thriving in an atmosphere thick with support. The apostle Paul exemplifies this practice, often affirming individuals in his letters. Although initially uncomfortable, affirming others becomes more natural over time and can transform relational cultures. Written notes are particularly powerful tools for encouragement, providing ongoing support and affirmation, and you can return to and reread them at any time. Think about a time when you received encouragement from a friend. How did it impact your relationship and your personal well-being? What specific aspects of their encouragement were most meaningful to you? Reflect on your own habits of affirming and encouraging others. How comfortable are you with giving genuine affirmation? What steps can you take to make this practice a more natural and regular part of your interactions? Weeding Once we've applied wisdom and put in the necessary work, we must address detrimental elements in our friendships. Like weeding a garden, we must also uproot negative influences to maintain the health of our relationships. 1. Burden Be mindful of inconsiderate behavior in friendships. Proverbs warns against actions that can burden rather than uplift. “ Whoever blesses his neighbor with a loud voice, rising early in the morning will be counted as cursing (27:14). Such gestures, while well-intentioned, may have bad timing and be perceived as inconsiderate. Also, avoid causing friendship fatigue by not overwhelming friends with excessive time together. “Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor's house lest he have his fill of you and hate you (25:17).” While spending significant time with friends is important, smothering them can lead to resentment. 2. Gossip Gossip is a poison within friendships, capable of easily dismantling the trust painstakingly built over time and ruining relationships. Proverbs cautions that even the faintest whisper can drive a wedge between the closest of friends (16:28). Such talk corrodes the very essence of friendship by sowing seeds of doubt and apprehension, making people wary of sharing their innermost thoughts and feelings. Indeed, the cornerstone of authentic friendship lies in the sacred trust shared between friends—a bond forged through years of shared experiences, vulnerabilities, and confidences. To breach this trust through gossip is to cause incredible harm and fracture connections that are difficult to mend. 3. Self-focus Every behavior that chokes out true friendships stems from a focus on oneself rather than on fostering healthy relationships. A self-centered attitude leads to a tendency to dwell on how others have wronged us rather than reflecting on our own shortcomings. True friendship requires a posture of repentance, where we acknowledge and address our own faults. By extending grace to our friends and accepting imperfection, we create an environment where authentic friendships can flourish. Which of the three relational weeds do you see most prevalent in your life (burden, gossip, or self-focus)? What are some ways you can uproot it? Relevant Scriptures : Deuteronomy 13:6 1 Samuel 18:1-4 Proverbs 16:28; 25:17; 27:14 John 15:15 2 John 12 3 John 13-14 Recommended Reading: Made For Friendship by Drew Hunter Made for People by Justin Whitmel Earley No Greater Love by Rebecca McLaughlin
By Chi Alpha September 3, 2024
Download Technology “Since, then, you have been raised with Christ, set your hearts on things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things.” -Colossians 3:1-2 As a college student, technology and the internet play a large role in your day-to-day life. You use them to check your grades, submit assignments, apply for internships, schedule meetings, and more. Not much changes after graduation; everyone from consultants to professors to CEOs to software engineers to truck drivers rely on technology for their work. And of course, new social media platforms are popping up every day, fighting for and demanding your attention. It’s unavoidable. As technology becomes more prevalent in our daily lives, it can be easy to dedicate more time and attention to our devices, time that is better spent elsewhere. As we spend more time plugged in, our devices form and shape us in ways we may not recognize for a long time. Thankfully, this is not a resource on how to simply avoid technology in your life because that would be futile. Rather, we need to reframe how we use our devices and learn how to take back control from those who manufacture them. How can we recognize the ways technology has formed us and make intentional choices to ensure our formation is centered around Jesus? As Felicia Wu Song, author of Restless Devices, puts it, “lifting our eyes off our screens and living more deeply into the time and place in which we are embedded.” Our Modern World Think about how many times a day you pick up your cell phone. Most smartphones calculate it for you, and you can see exactly how much time you spend on any given app, how many texts you send per day, etc. Those numbers can be harrowing; we don’t realize how much time and attention we are giving to our devices. Why did we become so engrossed with our phones? How have we become perpetually plugged in? Song writes, “Just as the digital is always accessible to us, we come to expect the same of people…We have fast become a people who are always available, always on call. Young people grow up into their friendships and personal identities in this engrossing fog of social pressures, stresses, and anxieties that had–until this point in human history–mainly been the purview of surgeons, firefighters, and workaholics. (And even then, first responders and doctors were professionally obligated to take time away from their beepers).” Like doctors and first responders, our phones have forced us to always be on call. We constantly feel the need to catch up on emails, texts, social media, and the news of the day. When the internet was first conceived, it was a space you had to intentionally enter by sitting at a desk, firing up a boxy computer, and logging into dial-up internet (as long as someone wasn’t using the home phone). Now, the digital space has entered our world; it’s in our pockets, our living rooms, our kitchen counters, and even our bedrooms, all running on high-speed internet. We no longer need to “do” anything to get connected—we are connected. Smartphones and the internet differ from past technological revolutions because they are specifically designed to attract both our time and attention. Unlike devices like the typewriter, lightbulb, or dishwasher, our devices are more than just tools to help us accomplish tasks. Every day, the brightest minds in the world are tweaking algorithms and designing new apps, all in an effort to capture more of our clicks, scrolls, and likes, which generates more revenue for them. The digital world is not neutral, and it’s certainly not out to make us healthier people. The tech industry is keenly aware of this: they know that we will be formed by the habits we keep, and their goal is to develop habits in us that make us return to them. Many tech executives or former tech executives will restrict their kids from using technology because they understand how the technology works better than anyone! Digital Liturgies Every time we open our phones, we are chemically programming our brains. When we get a notification, our stress response, cortisol, is activated, and whenever we open our phones to answer a message or scroll Instagram, dopamine, our pleasure response, is increased in the brain. This cycle of stress and pleasure is very similar to what gambling addicts describe when using a slot machine, which explains why we constantly check our phones even when we know there isn’t anything there. Technology has also pushed us to be maximally productive, or as Song calls it, “hypertasking.” Since technology allows us to do five things at once, why would we ever waste our time doing nothing? Well, as Song points out, “The irony of it all is that the very technology that promises to help us organize and efficiently deliver in our lives and relationships has merely subjected us to an avalanche of unprioritized demands on our attention and our lives.” Because of these addictive tendencies and the desire to hypertask, we aren’t using our time and attention well—we’re just giving our attention away. These practices are called “digital liturgies.” In the same way that the church has liturgies, such as saying the Lord’s Prayer before a sermon or raising hands during the benediction, our devices build habits into us. When we hear “ding” or feel a vibration, we respond by opening our phones. When we wake up, instead of making our bed and starting the day with peace, we immediately reach for our phones and see what we missed overnight. As Song puts it, “in the same way that Jesus called his disciples to become a people who abide in him as he would abide in them, we too have become a people who abide in the digital, and the digital abides in us.” Counterliturgies At this point, it may sound like the only solution is to take a sledgehammer to your phone and throw your laptop in a dumpster. Not only is that impractical, but it also won’t solve our problem. Instead, we need to counter our digital liturgies with new habits, aka “counterliturgies.” The following exercises are what Song calls “The Freedom Project,” an assignment she gives to her college classes. These are not exhaustive, but they’re great ways to start building healthier practices and take control back from your devices! Stage 1: Digital Media Fast -Go without any form of digital communication for 24 hours. This includes all text messaging, web browsing, social media, smartphone apps (even the weather app!), digital music (both streaming and CDs), streaming platforms like Netflix or YouTube, and video games (including mobile games). You should also abstain from digital news, including sports updates. You are allowed to use email and texts for work/school purposes or emergencies, but try and talk to friends and family before your experiment to limit those. You are allowed to read print media: books, newspapers, magazines. You may watch broadcast TV or go to a movie theater! This is hard to accomplish for 24 hours, so don’t feel pressured to make this a permanent lifestyle, but you can take lessons from it and apply them every day! Before the fast, make plans that will help you stay offline for the day. After the fast, journal what changes/adjustments you had to make, what you did with your day, and how you felt. Stage 2: Stocktaking - This is less about change and more about understanding your current habits and responses in the digital world. Monitoring Digital Usage: Download a time-tracking app, such as Screen Time, Moment, or Rescue Time. Before you begin monitoring, write down how many times you think you pick up your phone and how much time you spend on your phone per day. Track these over 5 days and compare with your guesses. How accurate were you? Did anything surprise you? Going Under the Microscope: Be hyperalert about your digital routines for one 24-hour period. Ask the below questions and reflect on the dynamics and trends you observe. In what situations am I nearly always using my phone? Are there triggers that automatically motivate me to reach for my phone? What is my physical/emotional state right before/after I use my phone? Are there moments when I realize I don’t have my phone? How do I feel then? When do I feel engaged, joyful, effective, & purposeful? Where am I? Who am I with? “Phone Meditation” Exercise: First, sit and become aware of your current feelings, posture, and focus/distraction level. Take out your phone and hold it. What changes do you notice in yourself? Posture, feelings, focus, etc. Next, unlock your phone and open a frequently used app. Spend a few moments scrolling or messaging, then observe yourself again for any shifts. Then turn off your phone and put it out of sight. Sit for an entire minute without doing anything. Take note of any differences again. Write and reflect on this activity as a whole. Motivation Check: Put a “stop sign” on your phone, either on your wallpaper or with a post-it note/rubber band. Ask yourself each time you pick it up: What am I going to do? Why now instead of later? What else could I do right now besides check my phone? Stage 3: Counterliturgy - Try new activities that push back against your digital/secular liturgies! Create a new bedtime/morning routine that doesn’t involve your phone. Maybe start your day by making your bed, exercising, reading/journaling, or enjoying the outdoors. In the evenings, read a book, write a note of gratitude, play music, or enjoy a cup of tea! Make a “sacred zone” around your bed for five days. Create a charging station for your phone/devices that is further away from where you normally set it, either across the room or in another room altogether. If you use your phone as your alarm, buy a physical alarm clock instead! You can use a watch to wake you up while your phone is across/outside the room. Experiment with monotasking. Choose an activity: studying, cooking, chores, gardening, etc., and do that activity without focusing on anything else during that time. Start with a small amount of time (20-30 minutes) and work your way up to monotasking for longer. Protect your sacred times. Block apps, video games, streaming services, and social media during certain times of the day, such as before bed and right after waking up. Observe when you run into these limits, and whether you want to break through them or find something else to do instead. Hopefully, whether through these exercises or others like them, we can all improve our relationship with technology and, more importantly, improve our connection with the world around us and the God who created it all! Technology plays a huge part in our lives, and it’s vital to our mission to spread the truth of Jesus around the world. By having healthy digital habits, we will display a life centered around the peace and love of Jesus to a world engrossed in screens, a world longing for a better way. Relevant Scriptures Psalm 91:1 ...Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High John 15:5. …If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit 1 John 2:15 …Do not love the world or anything in the world. Questions for Discussion What has been your relationship with technology, specifically your smartphone? Which of these counterliturgies do you need to practice the most? How will your improved relationship with technology help you share Jesus with others? Recommended Reading Restless Devices by Felicia Wu Song How to Break Up with Your Phone by Catherine Price